This was supposed to be a special year. I suppose it is a special year, but not for all the pleasant things that should make special. It is special due to so many unpleasant and worrying things that are connected with climate change, corona virus, rise of civil unrest, resurgence of white nationalism, TRUMP and so much more. It should have been special because my generation, my peers should be celebrating our 40 years, my kids should be celebrating their first 0 and my wife and I should be more enthusiastic about our 20 years of being together (the formula is thus: 40(me)+40(wife)+10(son)+10(daughter)+20(us)=120).
But after a quick kiss this morning and of to work I went, to work that takes me into the social environment full of masked people, casual glances and even more casual and reserved greetings, where we have been told that we are at a risk of contracting a potentially deadly virus but are still made to sit in our offices instead of being allowed to perform our working duties from the safety of our homes. While I still do not miss the social life (yeah, you can call me weird) I confess that the ambiguity of the measures regarding the covid has left me questioning the reasoning behind several things. But I will not get into that right now.
I can deal with many restriction – hell, I think I am one of the few people that never complains about wearing a mask. It really does not bother me, in fact I think it is the minimum of the safety precaution we should all be taking fort he benefit of our fellow humans. Fellow humans – a sentiment that is all but dead in the heated environment of conspiracy theories and rising tensions that we thought long erased by the self-percieved evolution of our society. Evolution my ass – in EU, one of the safer and stable region for the last 100 years, some countries are denied the budgetary money due to the fact (FACT, not political insinuations) that they do not protect the rights of the LGBTQ community, independence of educational institutions, independence of courts etc. The thing that worries me that we are moving our lovely Slovenia from a tolerant country into a direction I will not be able to sympathize with. Would that make me a revolutionary? For wanting to have broader rights and more tolerant country, that is inclusive of all the minorities that wish to share this space under the sun?
As you can see, a lot has transpired in the last month or so. I have gotten my 4.0 upgrade, as did my wife. And there was no need for a big celebration. In fact it was one of the more pleasant birthdays I have had in a long time. During that time it seems the world has gone mad, but I do firmly believe that there is no correlation between me turning forty and the world´s increasing insanity. And then I go and do a stupid thing like go and watch the new David Attenbourough´s new documentary, where he witnesses the degradation of our wonderful world causing us to decide to eat less meat as a family.
Next to this my creativity drive has (obviously) turned away from the blog and into more tangible projects. The first was a restoration project of an old rocking chair, that was due for scrap at my mum´s house. It was really a good project – smelling the wood while grinding the old paint of and then seeing it turn into a renewed piece of useful and gorgeous furniture. Then there was the repair of the VW beetle´s horn and restoration of an old steel picnic table etc. Staying outside from early morning till late afternoon, immersed in doing something tangible has given me a peace of mind I really did not think I needed.
This was all possible due to the fact that (apart from having a very understanding wife) the kids do not need our attention as much as before. Even last year it felt like we still needed to be there for them almost all day every day. But this year something happened and the come home with plans of their own, ideas about the afternoon that was not planned by us and a certain degree of independence that does not require or even desire our presence. They have definitely taken a first step into the more adult-like independent state of mind and that is exactly how it should be.